of Spam! Issue numb 47: "CELEBRITY!"
Sex with the stars! That's what fame
feels like. Even stars want to have sex with
the stars. It's true. It's on the news. It's
in the news. There's no escaping it. It's
hypnotic. And... Yes... You...
You can have it , too.
know you want it, too.
repeat after me: "Nothing is more important
than being important. And nothing feels or
seems more important than being famous. Be
famous! Be a celebrity! Be celebrated! Be
is the most potent and the most intoxicating
elixir of youth. Fame is by far the most famous
of all immortalized love potions. Love and
be loved on a scale you can't imagine. Be
a celebrity! It promises to be a mind-blowing
cosmic orgy of interdimensional, interracial
and international public lovemaking.
be the only one uninvited to the world's party.
Don't let all those undeserving others be
the life of the party. Don't hide your light
under a bushel. Open yourself up to the world.
Come out and party! The night's still young.
It. You're Nothing If Your Not Known!"
nothing if not known. You're nothing if you're
an unknown. You're worst than nothing if you're
content with remaining unknown.
get off your damn lazy ass and try to become
known! You deserve nothing if you don't at
known! Become known for something, anything.
I don't care. Become known for being known.
Become known for becoming known. Become known
for getting known. Become
Unknown? Like You're a big.. fat.. Nothing?
Close the Curtains. Draw the Latch. Sit by
the Fire and Spin. Fan the Flame of Disgruntled
Infamy in this Deep Damn Dark. Then Explode!
Launch your Attack! Make your Damn Presence
known!" Sang and Scoffed The